Do You Love Your Job?

Last Saturday, I headed into the city centre for a long anticipated 'totally let the hair down' night out. I had an absolute ball but of course I was, as always, people watching! Our waitress didn't seem to like her job at all and it was really noticeable. She was so rude to us and the other diners, it even became funny. I wondered though why she was working there and what she really wanted to be doing instead. I wondered how long she had been there and how long she would stay there. I wondered was she afraid to do something different? Has the recession forced her to believe that she has no choice?

Walking through Temple Bar, we spotted a crowd and just had to see what was going on! As soon as I saw, I had to smile! Ingenious! A man offering the people in the crowd a chance to win €30 euro if they could cycle a bike about 6 feet, yes there was a catch! The bike had been altered so that if you turned it left, it would go right and vice versa. The cost of attempting was €4 and in the ten minutes we watched (and participated!), this enterprising man earned himself at least €40.

 Again, I began pondering... I thought that this man was exceptional! He had a skill/talent that he had mastered (he could ride this backwards bike no problem!) and had taken action on it and was making a killing! Was he doing it for fun? What were his circumstances? Did he find himself in difficulty and decide to do something novel about it?

On the way home going through the arch in Temple Bar, I heard live music and turned on my heels into The Merchants Arch. The atmosphere was electric and it was all because of one man. There was a singer/songwriter (trying to get his name!) in the bar with his guitar and he was fantastic. It wasn't just because he was talented musician but because he loved what he did, he had passion, enthusiasm and it was impossible not to notice. The crowd picked up on how much he was enjoying himself and they couldn't help but do the same. Again, the pondering.. Did he do this full-time? Did he have another job and was this a hobby? How long did he spend learning? Was this something he always wanted to do? What did he want to do in the future? There was something charmed about this guy and I bet you that he knows it too.

So that was my night off! The reason why I was fascinated with these individuals is because I've worked with clients who have been miserable in their jobs and I have seen them to the place where they feel charmed in their career. The reason why I'm so good at it is because I used to be like the waitress but now my career is something I love and that I'm passionate about.

So where would you fit in? Are you like the waitress or the musician? Where would you like to be? Do you enjoy your job? Would you rather be doing something else? If so, what and why aren't you doing that?

Your twenties are the time to take chances and figure out who you are and what you really want. If you feel stuck and miserable now, imagine 2 years, 5 years time. What's holding you back now will still be there in the future- and that is yourself. You're the only thing in your way.

Your Aspirations Coach,

Paula

www.theaspirationscoach.com

Change your attitude, change your life...

The remarkable thing we have is a choice every day regarding the attitude we will embrace for that day. We cannot change our past. We cannot change the fact that people will act in a certain way. We cannot change the inevitable. The only thing we can do is play on the one string we have, and that is our attitude.” -Charles Swindoll

I remember going through a rough patch in my life a few years ago and each day I would wake up feeling anxious, discontented and just downright uncomfortable. I blamed my unhappiness on the fact that things just weren’t working out the way I wanted them to, it wasn’t going according to plan. As you may know, I’ve been studying self-development and coaching for about 14 years so I went to my personal library and started searching. I came across the above quote and this was a critical lesson for me. I had always just assumed that in order for me to feel better or happier, everything in my external world had to be fixed and better.

Many of us go along the line of allowing what is happening in our life to determine what kind of mood we are in. The circumstances of our lives become the driving force for our thoughts, feelings and behaviour. Then we look for something external to help us ease the uneasiness! But often the uneasiness that we are experiencing is a result of how we feel about our circumstances- it becomes a cycle that many of us can get stuck in.

 I dealt with this issue recently with a client and rather than trying to directly change what was happening (the circumstances), we worked on changing his perception and attitude. Once he was able to see his circumstances from another perspective, he was able to change his thoughts and behaviour. The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and gain expecting different results. The new thoughts and behaviour that my client practised worked and he changed his circumstances and got out of a cycle he had been stuck in for years.

So, what external forces are you allowing to determine your current mood? Can you recognise that you may be stuck in this cycle? If so, I would strongly encourage you to look inside and take your mood back into your own hands. I can guarantee you that it feels so good and empowering to know that you don’t have to wait until your circumstances become what you want them to be. You are capable of determining your own inner experience not matter what is going on in the world around you.

Paula,

Your Aspirations Coach

‘The appearance of things change according to the emotions and thus we see magic and beauty in them, while the magic and beauty are really in ourselves." - Kahlil Gibran

Decision Versus Choice

Why do twenty-somethings find it so difficult to make decisions? Often making the decision is harder than taking the action that we would have to take as a result from the decision. A reason that we may struggle with decisions is because a part of us thinks if we decide one thing, we are going to lose or miss out on something else. To help you in feeling some freedom around decision making, I want to share with you a distinction between the words CHOICE and DECISION.

Notice how you feel inside when you think you have to decide something. Does it feel different from how you feel when you get to choose something? Many of us experience feeling overwhelmed, dread and anxiety when we use the word decision. Why is that? Well look at the root word of decision: DECIDE. It contains the Latin root of “cide” which means to “cut down or kill.” How is this relevant? Well because the words we think and say have a lot of meaning to us, especially on the unconscious level.

 When we feel we have to decide something, some of the anxiety that comes forward has to do with the feeling that we are cutting or killing off something, therein creating more internal conflict. We often buy into the limiting belief that if we decide one thing, we will loose something else instead of seeing the bigger picture of how much we can actually gain from committing to a choice.

When I work with my twenty-something clients who agonise over decision making, I always get them to look at it as a choice. The words ‘Choose’ and ‘Choice’ elicit a lot more personal power and sense of freedom than ‘decide’ and ‘decision’. Try it yourself and you will see what a difference it can make!

Paula

It is our choices ... that show what we truly are, far more than our abilities.
— J.K. Rowling