Progress:
Ignoring the Gremlin
Our doubts are
traitors and make us lose the good we oft might win by fearing to attempt. – William
Shakespeare
Self
doubt has been something I’ve always struggled with. It’s a pity I never joined
a debating team because by the time I was in my late teens, I had plenty of
practice! There was a never ending debate in my head about everything; it was as
if I had a split personality. I would want to do something but then I’d have
that little voice in my head saying ‘Oohh, be careful- you could screw it up
and make a show of yourself’.
The
more I wanted to try, grow, learn and experience, the more that little voice
spoke up. It got to the point that on many occasions, I actually listened to it
and I held myself back. I think one of those times was in fact the decision as
to whether to join a debating society in college- the little voice in my head
told me I’d make a balls of it so I didn’t even put my name down to try.
Self-doubt is that
feeling of uncertainty about your ability to accomplish something. It can be
like a dark shadow of insecurity that follows us around and it can lead to
hesitation and indecision. If we don’t do anything about it, it can cause us to
abandon our dreams or radically lower our expectations of ourselves.
It’s
important to know that everyone
has their own little gremlin inside their head! Call it what you will- your
saboteur, your inner critic, Charlie- whatever! The only dangerous name that
you can call it is ‘Me’. Often people think that their inner critic is who they
really are and who they ever will be and that is a lie. It is simply
doubts and fears which you have learnt and adopted as you went through your
life and ........anything that you have learned, you can unlearn.
The
people that you admire seem to ooze confidence and charisma has simply learnt
how to deal with their own gremlins! There are strategies and techniques that
they have used or are using and I’m going to share with you the top 5
strategies that myself and my clients have found useful for dealing with your
inner gremlin!
My top 5 strategies for dealing with
your Inner Gremlin.
1. Recognise and acknowledge your
doubts
You cannot overcome something
until you first recognise and acknowledge its existence. If we ignore self-doubt,
it will still be there whether we like it or not and it will stop us from
moving forward. Bottom line, you need to deal with it because it won’t go away
unless you sacrifice your progress. The better you become at identifying hidden
doubts, the easier it will be to overcome them.
Ask yourself ‘What triggered
this and why am I feeling this way?’ Information is power and you are beginning
to take back your power.
2.
Is there a pattern?
You probably know the
answer to this already! Doubt tends to have favourite places to hang out so the
chances are that you have experienced it in a similar situation before. Think
about it, public speaking? Driving? Cooking? Dating? Talking to your boss?
Asking for a raise?
Is there any situation
that you’ve experienced doubt before but you overcame it? If so, what did you
do? What steps did you take? If not, what could you do differently next time
around?
3. Create a plan
So now, you have
acknowledged its existence, you are aware of the patterns and you have a good
idea as to what you could you differently. Now, I want you to sit down and plan
out a strategy for defeating your self-doubt. For example, if you have to give
a presentation, then make a plan to prepare and practice your presentation
until all your doubts are obliterated and you know that you are capable of it.
Make an educated decision about what to do next? Ask for help if you want, two
heads are always better than one. Put your plan in writing.
4. Take action and be flexible
Once you have your
plan in writing, try to identify some possible challenges along the way and
decide what you will do about them. This will add to your confidence as you
will feel more prepared. Using the above example of a presentation, hire a
professional public speaking coach to help you or ask a friend. Sometimes, a
little support and encouragement is all it takes.
5. Celebrate your Success
Buy yourself a new
journal and each time you overcome self-doubt, make a note of it. Reward
yourself! Remember it has taken you years to learn how to doubt yourself so
well so it will take time to unlearn. This is why it is so important to
acknowledge and reward yourself for each thing you overcome. To journal it is
great because then you have a written reference of all the times you kicked
ass!
I hope you enjoyed this
issue of Progress! Please feel free to get in touch and share any of your
thoughts or ideas with me via email/facebook/twitter! I’d love to hear from
you! Also, if you have a topic or question you would like me to address, please
just let me know!
Until next time,
Love and Respect,
Paula
About Me
My
name is Paula Coogan and I am the owner of The Aspirations Coach, a Life and
Career coaching business I set up in May 2011. My work is dedicated to
supporting individuals in their 20’s and 30’s who have aspirations in any area
of life. I firmly believe that we are all capable of so much more than what we
currently think we are.
I
am passionate about what I do and get such satisfaction from seeing my clients’
progress and reach their aspirations. I work with clients on a one-to-one basis
for a minimum of 3 months, for more information please visit
www.TheAspirationsCoach.com
E-mail:
info@theaspirationscoach.com
Website: www.TheAspirationsCoach.com
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/TheAspirationsCoach
Twitter: http://twitter.com/#!/paulacoogan
Progress is a free fortnightly
ezine designed to support individuals in their 20’s and 30’s who wish to
progress in all areas of life. You'll get free tips to help you push forward
and create your ultimate life today.
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